Where even the minister gets the church giggles

Treza and I ventured to the local Unitarian church this morning to see what all the rage is about. I packed my bag with mittens and snarky cynicism ready to judge the non-judgers.
But wait? What?! How could a worship place out cynic us?!
It was the Thanksgiving service. They called all the kids up to the front of the church while one of the three ministers (Two of which are female. Woot.) where she went over the basic rules of being a guest at Thanksgiving dinner. There were poster boards with each lesson and a picture to match very obviously visually directed toward children.
These are the things I learned at the Unitarian Universalist church this morning:

1. Don't spread germs.
   
1. Picture: Child coughing into arm, also "Small Pox" with an X through it.
2. Try everything once.
1. Minister: "Even if it's something weird. Like veal." Mini: "I'm a vegetarian." Minister: "Then you don't have to try the veal. But you should try squash."
3. Don't chew with your mouth open.
4. Don't take more than your share.
1. Minister: "Or if you're a pilgrim from England or Holland, North America really isn't yours to take at all. But it's a little too late for that, isn't it kids?!"
5. Offer to help your hosts.
   
6. Don't complain if things are different than when you're at home.
7. Don't kidnap your hosts and sell them as slaves in Spain.