When out for her birthday dinner at a Chinese restaurant, Mom thought it'd be fun to teach the grandparents about the old "in bed" trick when you get a fortune cookie. You know..where you add "in bed" to the end of your fortune? Something my mother shouldn't know about anyways, and then shouldn't tell her hard of hearing parents about in a public place, if at all.
Imagine all of the following being yelled in the dining room of a small Chinese restaurant by a series of elderly people.
"There is in the worst of fortunes the best chance of a happy ending...in bed"
"Where there is no vision, the people perish...in bed."
"Politeness costs nothing and gains everything..in bed."
"The thing I fear most is fear...in bed"
"There is no shame in failure- only in quitting....in bed."
These are the same grandparents whose answering machine is "Thanks for calling Sally and Wally, leave a message after the tone, by golly".
Insert sound of dirty boot stomping my childhood memories to a pulp.
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